Fall Fashion and Shopping Your Closet

From what I can tell by looking at my crop of fashion mags, the season's approved trends from the style czarinas are:

1. Military-inspired
2. Equestrian
3. Preppy
4. Shiny, super-black, hard-edged futurism
5. Black lace
6. Capes
7. Huge faux-fur vests (look ref:  Rachel Zoe, but those on her show are likely real)


Unfortunately, I'm not feeling any of it.  Nos. 1-3 are popular every fall, so if you've held on to any riffs on these trends over the past 15 years that you can still fit in, dust it off and maybe add a skinny belt, slim fit jeans/menswear-inspired pant and updated accessories.  I wish I was kidding.

No. 4 just feels like a retread of styles we've seen over the past year.  Think bold, Rihanna-esque styles for the masses.

No 5.  Sexy in theory, but the way it is being presented right now is either a little too risque' or "1950s housewife out at her husband's business dinner" for most of us.

Nos. 6 and 7 are just not practical for the average sister.  Capes just make anyone under 40 look old, and the non-vintage faux furs at an affordable price point just look tacky up close, and they probably won't age well.  Don't invest in the fakeness.

I'm not trying to be negative.  Believe me, I wish there was more for me to love.

The only item that's given me fashion frisson is 3.1. Phillip Lim's paneled shearling coat with leather underlay.
http://www.elleuk.com/catwalk/collections/3.1-phillip-lim/autumn-winter-2010/collection/lim-rf10-0240-3.1-phillip-lim-new-york-autumn-winter-2010/(index)/18

*Drooling on keyboard*

Waaay out of my price range, but I'm sure someone's already knocking it off.

I can't be the only one that feels this way about the new fall styles.  I think that most grown women will be keeping their pocketbooks closed re the hard sell items and just getting replacements for essentials this season.